my mind screams

i feel like my brain is wrapped around itself

it's wrapped around itself and choking itself to death 

a thought scathed my mind today

you grow older 

you acquire less time 

you eventually learn how to prioritize 

you realize 

some people

arenolongerworthyourtime

you learn that you don't instantly fit snug with just any person and no matter how you try to stretch your mouth a little wider or pry the flaps of your heart a little looser

it is either too hard or too impossible 
tofitwiththem

i have been fumbling for my losing hours and my slipping minutes and my ticking seconds

my scrambling arms a whirl of gunned confusion 

it has come to light that i am indeed failing to conquer the life that has been routed for me 

what kind of special hell is this?

i am curling in revolt and not conforming like a proper human being 

the earth is splitting apart before my very eyes 

then are we anomalies?

where do we fit? 

where is the logic in our fucked-up frenzy?

i scream for answers everyday. 

[ c.c ]